Years add wisdom, difficulties build strength, love moves mountains, tears nourish growth, dreams reveal purpose, character buries superficiality...Truth IS.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

A Call To Judgment

I'mmmm Baaaack...

It's been a while and I know my posts on here have been very few and far between..got a lot going on...busy, busy, busy.  However, I've had something stuck in my craw for a few days and this arena seems to be the best outlet for such things.  Today, I would like to talk a bit about the "J" word--yes, I am going to go there.  I would consider myself a very spiritual, very sensitive, very deep, and very conscientious person--but what I am NOT and will never be is NONJUDGEMENTAL.  I do quite a bit of reading and I view a lot of programming where our modern-day spiritual gurus are claiming to live life in the moment WITHOUT judgement.  Just like every church I've ever been a part of while searching for "truth"...this one issue doesn't sit right with me.  This is the cog in my spiritual wheel at this point.  I feel that judgement is a very necessary component to my spirituality and my life as a whole--and to make it sound or appear as if it is some sort of "insidious play of the ego or otherwise spiritually nonproductive trait" is ludicrous to me.

They teach that our intentions are where our power lies.  THIS I do believe, as I stumbled across this realization on my own long before it was eventually validated by others.  However, if this is indeed the case...without judgment, our intentions would never really materialize.  There are a lot of things to consider before setting out to achieve a goal--and they are ALL judgment calls.  

I think what needs to be brought to light is the way in which judgment is utilized.  Are your intentions in disregard to others and for self-promotion or profit?  This is a MISUSE of judgment...and this is what I believe should  be narrowed down in the teaching of a "spiritual life."  It is not WITHOUT judgement that we view anything...but rather, it is with "good judgment."  If you seek to define judgment, this is what you will find:  The ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions.  Words synonymous with judgement are as follows:  Discernment, acumen, sense, wisdom, reason, logic.  I don't know what spiritual principles anyone else follows, but DISCERNMENT/WISDOM are two of the BIGGIES in the "DO and BE" categories contained in any of them.  Certainly, it does outline with what "spirit" we utilize our discernment and wisdom, however, it is a powerful "suggestion" that we do use them.  So to be without judgment, is to be without balance, without solidarity, without grounding.

There is one "spiritual teacher" who has written many books, done many television appearances and is regarded as very knowledgeable whom I find to be somewhat hard to follow.  He stumbles over his words, cannot seem to express what it is that he wants to say and talks in circles, albeit...calm, soft-spoken, and inexpressive circles...but circles, nonetheless.  It is nearly impossible for me to understand anything he is trying to convey.  Although the message that ALWAYS comes through is "being aware and experiencing every moment without judgment."  The thing that really cracks me up is that I truly believe that he is one of the very few who is capable of this...but if you look at the bigger picture that forms...yes, he is quiet-natured, yes, he is a very still spirit--he talks VERY slowly, walks very slowly, and his body language seems to be a bit awkward and well behind his thought process.  Although he has the "NOT OF THIS WORLD" down to a science, the fact that we are PART of this world is where I detach from him.  This is the balance in it all...and if his message is being nonjudgmental of ANYTHING, he is a clear and true representation of this. You definitely cannot say that he doesn't walk what he talks.  However...I believe our spirit to be our light, our energy-source, the center of what makes each of us DYNAMIC and BRIGHT.  To have a dull spirit is not to have a better one, a more mature one, or a more wise one.  There is nothing so invigorating than to be around someone with a fully engaged spirit...it is contagious...and this is what being PART of this world means---it is ENGAGEMENT/FELLOWSHIP with ALL that is.  Anything we believe in and pattern our life around comes from a judgment.  It is this man's own judgment to "judge nothing"..understand?

Trust me, I am the poster child of poor judgment and what I've outlined above about this particular man is not to bash him in any way...it is just an observation of thought pattern, language, and behavior and how it meshes with the message that is being conveyed--in other words,  consideration of the "parts to the whole."  We always have to consider what fits with us and what doesn't or else we would all be just wayward souls with no destination.  There would never be any choices TO be made if we judged nothing and if our "lives are the sum total of the choices we make"...then we wouldn't really even be living, would we---there is a difference between EXISTENCE and LIFE.  To further comment about my poor judgment calls, I've learned that this TOO is a result of imbalance...too much emotion, not enough reason-- too much fear, not enough courage, too much attachment to control and not enough faith in what's truly best for me.  In my case, I can say that in EVERY instance I've ever felt that deep pang of regret for choices I've made--it was the result of always knowing but denying, an attachment to an outcome I had my heart set on...whether reality was in line with it or not and the fear of having that attachment broken because I had become SO dependent upon it.  They were instances where I would suppress, delay, or attempt to deter pain the pain of just facing the truth about them.  My emotions were driving and I KNOWINGLY placed my logic behind them...My honest judgment of the situation had been told to "shut up" because of a deeper need in me to avoid at all costs the pain I would suffer in lending it any heed.  I sold my integrity out for comfort WAY TOO MANY TIMES.  I can say with CERTAINTY that for me, the worst crisis I've ever been through in my entire life was that of questioning my judgement.  It is a very frightening place to be, and I never want to go back there.  It was the single-most paralyzing fear I've ever experienced.  So I've learned the hard way that sometimes the things we want ARE not always the best things for us..and that it is just a lot easier to see things as they are NOW without any notion or hope whatsoever that they will ever be any different and it may deter us from forming an emotional attachment to a "wished for" outcome while incessantly fighting back the reality that it is probably never going to happen.

So with all of that being said, what sparked this little write-up was a conversation I was involved in about an article written about the $600,000 theft of Joel Osteen's church.  The article stated that this was "only" money that had been collected over ONE weekend and that it did not effect in any way any contributions that came by mail or online or before or after that weekend.  The article went on to say that if this man takes in this much money in one weekend (that just covers about 1/2 of the total contributions made), that he must be rolling in millions per year.  These words were straight out of the mouths of he and his wife...the total sum stolen ($600,000) and the fact that it was LIMITED to 2 days collection and then further LIMITED to contributions other than mailed or online contributions...so I'm thinking that the conclusions that are drawn by most who read this are the same...holy money-pit Batman!!  So the topic of conversation was--as you guessed it...a series of opinions and judgment calls.  Here we have a self-professed "man of God" (fact) publicizing a pretty huge amount of money being stolen from his church safe (fact)...though, if we were to think in terms of ratios..would be likened to anyone of the middle-class reporting to the police the theft of our "change jar."  Because I am a person who seeks a deeper meaning in everything and because this man is so high-profile, I have TRIED to like this guy.  I mean, people seem to really like him,  and the words that come out of his mouth are that of personal empowerment through faith...and he does seem to share a message of hope.  HOWEVER...there has always been something that doesn't hang well with me about him.  Can't put my finger on it, but just like everything else I JUDGE to be right or wrong for me, it comes from this .feeling in my gut...this nudging in my spirit that tells me something isn't quite right about this, so I don't watch or listen to him.  I don't have to know what it is that doesn't fit, I just know that FOR ME, something definitely doesn't.  So I know I've climbed over the hurdle of putting what I "WANT" to believe in greater perspective and I now listen to that gut instinct before I get my emotions all twisted up in the mix.  OK.  So off of the digression and onto the point....I had made a comment that there has always been something that didn't quite set well with me about him...then, taking into consideration the entire article and the vibe I get from this guy, I couldn't help but think about "the marketplace" in the Bible.  People who were commenting were speaking  of his "followers" and THAT hit me the wrong way...then people were talking of the hope HE gives them and "so what if he makes millions...for the message of hope he gives the people, he deserves that money."  Now, I do not claim in any way to be a  rocket scientist, but I think that if anyone is any kind of decent human life-form at all, WE ALL offer hope, faith, and encouragement to others on a daily basis.  We all share a smile, a kind word, a message of hope and actions of purpose...and I don't think that it ever enters our minds to MARKET the kindness and compassion that flows so naturally from us. Point one.  Point two...we are all equipped with a spirit and a soul...THIS is what we are to follow.   "The kingdom of God is within you"  Now to point three...WHY, WHY, WHY would he even publicize or even report this to the authorities...it is obviously (by he and his wife's own admission) a drop in the bucket, so I would be more-so inclined to believe that a selfless man of God may have just said...well, someone obviously needed that money a lot more than we did, (pray for them) and then took INSIDE and PRIVATE action to guard against this happening again.  I am in no way condoning thievery.  It is not a commendable trait at all to possess and rightly, it shouldn't go unpunished, but you have to think outside of the box a little bit here...reporting and publicizing it HELPS his organization because it sends a wave of SHOCK into the community and society as a whole...and it aids to solidify the message that our society in need of being saved...so what he sells becomes even MORE profitable, more believable...his followers rush to give back all he has lost, his book sales go through the roof...because his organization has been the unfortunate and very PUBLICIZED victim of crime and all of whom that support his ministry will rally in solidarity to avenge his character.  However, with that...also comes some maybe not too pleasant fallout.  I commented that it probably would have been in his best interest to keep this information quiet and contained because now the IRS undoubtedly has their own agenda.  Now the conclusions I've drawn from the factual information given along with my own gut feelings about the situation compiled an opinion...a judgement of the situation.  It is mine, I own it, and I am not in any way claiming it to be TRUTH beyond a shadow of a doubt, nor am I upset about any opinions to the contrary--nor do I view them as anything other than a conclusion drawn by another with a different scope on the situation.  I don't voice my opinion in an effort to change someone else's or sway it one way or another...it just is what it is.  Without a stance or opinion on a topic, there really IS no conversation.  It is merely MY take on the situation.  A comment that followed:  "I thought I was judgmental, but there is no way I could possibly top some of these comments."  First of all, YOU already DID--lol.  The art of a productive and interesting discussion about a highly publicized matter is that of keeping the "personal attack" of those discussing it out of it and sticking to the topic.  To hoist yourself up to a higher level than someone else by saying "I could never be so judgmental" is an attempt to make others seem to be BENEATH you to a level you could NEVER go to, and that in itself is a blatant display of what you claim to abhor.

So I guess the moral of this story is....in order to trust yourself, you must trust your own judgment--and you MUST trust your own judgment if you are to act upon or succeed in anything.  We need this in order to develop faith.  Good, sound judgment.  If you limit this very vital part of life's balancing act to merely attempting to reduce others, it is just improper USE of it.  So if you call me judgmental, I'm not gonna cry about it because you see, I've used my judgment enough to know WHO I am and how I arrive at conclusions and I know it is never in any way to market myself or leverage myself above anyone else.  I am in no way ashamed of who I am or the many mistakes I have made in the process of figuring that out.  I do not use my judgment to exploit others, I use it to improve myself and to protect my integrity.

1 Corinthians 2:15:  "But he that is spiritual judgeth all things."
1 Thessalonians 5:21:  "By all means, use your judgment and hold on to whatever is good."
Luke 12:57:  "Why don't you judge for yourselves what is right."
2 Corinthians 10:7:  "You are only looking at the surface of things."
John 7:24:  "You must not judge by the appearance of things, but by the reality."

Have a great weekend!!







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