Years add wisdom, difficulties build strength, love moves mountains, tears nourish growth, dreams reveal purpose, character buries superficiality...Truth IS.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

The "other" names for freedom....

Good morning friends!

Hope this post finds everyone well! As of late, I have been thinking about education and employment. See, I have encouraged all of my children to go to college (and I have attended myself) because in this world, it is the "token" that gets you noticed by potential employers. Now, I then think WHY is it like this. The educational system (university level) is SO in bed with the government, literally raping those looking to better and/or secure their future, by immediately putting the pressure of debt onto its students. The book costs are outrageous, the tuition is through the roof, and these poor kids (and seasoned adults) graduate these institutions with their bachelor's degree with only 6 months to find gainful employment before the banks have their hands out for their money. What happens is that approximately half of students with a bachelor's degree enter the workforce from college at low-paying, entry level positions because there are no positions available to them in their area of study, which then takes jobs away from the "under-educated" population trying to make ends meet and support their families. I've also read that a lot of employers will not hire someone who has been "unemployed" for over a year, because it is too much of a time lapse between employment. Now I ask, IN THIS ECONOMY, you can seriously discriminate against someone who has been unemployed due to circumstances BEYOND their control---for HOWEVER long?

My take on this whole scenario is that discriminatory practices go on right under our noses and no one says anything, does anything about it, and just allows this to happen. For one, the word and notion of "REQUIRED" in reference to a level of education in order to even be CONSIDERED for a position should be banned as far as I am concerned. To me, this is discriminatory. I would argue that there are people with half the education or no college education at all and twice the experience that would run circles around a new 4-year college graduate in job performance. In this country of free enterprise, we should promote and defend "OPPORTUNITY FOR ALL", not a select few. And then what happens when these 4-year college grads go and snap up all the entry-level (no formal education required) positions from those who HAVE NO formal education JUST BECAUSE they have "more" of an education? This then, is covert discrimination. Just as it is a requirement for the higher-paying, more technically advanced positions to have a formal education REQUIREMENT to even be CONSIDERED at all, these entry-level jobs should disallow a formal education. Oh, but the latter concept would BE discrimination....REALLY???? Money attracts money...poverty attracts poverty.

It is my thought that there are people out there who have had no formal education in a area of interest or specific INNATE talent they posses. For instance, how many successful musicians were formally trained? I would venture to say...not too many. They don't get signed to a record label because they graduated Julliard...they get signed because their talent is noticed and they are given a chance to prove their talent. A majority of them are self-taught. I think about Michelangelo...and how we would never have chance to glance at the breathtaking work he had done on the Sistine Chapel...or the architectural sculptures had been "required" to have a formal education. Albert Einstein, though a 4-year college graduate, dropped out of high school, was disliked by all of his teachers, and while working as a patent clerk wrote the first of his scientific papers to be published, was offered positions to teach at various universities---(without that dreaded Master's degree or even PhD that is *required* nowadays to do such a thing) and to be totally honest, he didn't NEED the education to do any of it...he had an inquisitive and expansive mind and an innate understanding of what interested him...he only went to college because he felt he HAD to in order to do what he already innately knew how to do to begin with...and to be honest, if you know anything about him...he balked at the educational system as a whole and felt it also to be a very insignificant part of his motivation, knowledge, and gave it pretty much no credit at all for any of his achievement---even HIS teaching style.

I will tell you with a pretty solid belief that there are a ton of people who could do the same job as well if not even better than someone who is technically trained to do so. There is something to be said for passion and experience, and the self-discipline it takes someone who cannot AFFORD a formal education to take it upon themselves to educate themselves, research and or practice tireless hours, gain experience on their own WITHOUT the benefit of being "paid" for it. There is also something to be said about an exemplary work-ethic of those who NEED a job to survive and take care of their family--they don't take any opportunity for granted, as maybe some Harvard graduate whose education was paid for my their parents..??? Do we, in the wise words of Martin Luther King Jr., judge someone unfairly because of outward appearance (or in any discriminatory way), really while avoiding the content of one's character.

Food for thought. I am thinking it is time that someone started a coalition for "employment of the innately talented"...yeah...maybe it is time for something like this...I'm am SO sick of the corporate powers-that-be setting the bar for survival only high enough for them to achieve. We all should have the same rights, the same chance to prove ourselves, and the same opportunity to DO SO.

So for today, good day...and I will be working on this, because it is something I am passionate about and believe in.

I would welcome any comments

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Integration

Good morning friends!!

I am sitting here this morning with all kinds of thoughts whirling through my mind...all of them are very different and polar...oh no...am I am becoming bi-tri-or quadripolar? HA! Hmmm, sometimes, I wonder!!

The first thing I noticed is that when I am writing ANYTHING, my focus seems to be very serious with attention to detail...though, this just happens so automatically. However, if I were to be talking with someone, I don't come across that way at ALL!! I use a lot of slang, I cuss a lot, and am VERY animated and somewhat comical...my kids tell me that I don't even have to speak, that people could actually get an idea of everything I am saying through my hand motions, facial expression, and body language!! So this makes me think that although the ideas I put into my writing in large part, touch on the deepest "me"...a lot of "me" is also absent from it.

I am SUCH a goof sometimes, and a lot of times, I laugh at myself because I think to myself "You are SUCH an idiot!!" I can find the humor in anything..everything...and actually LOOK for it, and usually, I find it in the irony---and have no problem pointing it out to anyone who will listen!!

I just find this dynamic to be strange in a way...how it is just so automatic for me to be so analytical and philosophical without even thinking when I write (as if it is a pre-programmed prerequisite to sitting at a keyboard or something)...and I am not saying that I am not that way in "real time"..because I am, but it is not constantly outwardly displayed. I mean, I would be pretty boring if it were.

So this leads me to conclude that writing for me is definitely an outlet...a pressure valve, so to speak. It is a place where I can expel things that bother me, intrigue me, and blend with me on the very deepest level--the place I believe that everyone is most alike and can relate to one another. It may even be the place of the greatest vulnerability inside of me that I would rather share with strangers on a more impersonal level...and in many ways, the venue for "reading" these deeper things about someone else has its value as well. I guess that I sort of hope that when I share some "revelatory" thing personal to me that it may indeed touch on an area in someone else's life, that they, themselves, may think no one else would be "interested" in hearing or knowing about them, so they keep that all inside thinking that no one else could possibly understand that part of them. Or maybe, I am completely off-base there too...who can ever know. It seems that since I have been doing this blog, I have gotten very few responses to anything I have written, though I have continued readership...so it is like having a conversation with myself, only in writing...LOL. I have no idea why my readers continue to return, but I appreciate that you do, for whatever the reason may be.

So, I guess I have discovered that even though my personality may be more laid-back, nonsensical, and completely casual, that it must compliment the more serious and foundational "me." and at the same time, I laugh hysterically at the possible reaction of someone who just reads the stuff I post here if they were to see some of the every-day stuff that goes on on a regular day in the life...

I guess there is something to be said for mystery!!
Hope everyone has a good day and weekend!!

Well, I guess that's it for today...I'll save the other stuff floating around in my brain for another day!!

Friday, January 13, 2012

Nature...who can be completely sure about it?

Hi everyone...

Well, we woke up to a seemingly angry winter day!! I guess old man winter has gotten tired of his retreat and docile nature this year. You'll have that I guess! The amount of snowfall we have gotten this year is about 3" (before today), and for an area that is customarily used to 80-160 inches by the end of the season, I would say that at the halfway point, we have done well--OR--we have a LOT of catching up to do in the second half of this season. Shit...we usually already have that 3 inches under our belt by the end of November!! As I sit this morning, looking out my window, I think about how nature's wiles and whims are not unlike those of human nature. They can be so predictable at times, and at others...not so much at all. But all-in-all, we take a picture of things as we become accustomed to them and compare the happenstance of the moment to them, don't we?

Hence, my mind this morning travels to the phenomenon of repression. Some would term repression as an avoidance of emotion because of an inability to deal with it, or just a personal choice not to. Someone very dear to me said to me once, "Ever since I have known you, (even when you were a little girl), you have always been one to behave like you are always okay. You are not one to display need or ask for anything because you would rather deal with it yourself." I've come to find that although most may view this as a good attribute to have and some may even ENVY it in others...the person who is like this really stands on uneven ground and, at times, is really experiencing some pretty harsh inner turmoil.

These are the things that I hear "about" me from others:
1. You are a strong woman, I have no doubt that you will be okay.
2. Talking to you makes me feel better.
3. You are so intelligent.
4. You should be very proud of the job you have done with your children.
5. You are one of the most caring, unselfish people I know.
6. You have a way with words (expressing yourself).
7. I feel comfortable around you (and in your home).
8. You are so insightful and full of wisdom.
9. You are deep. (sometimes with the modifier "too" in front of it).
10. And of things I say..."I've never thought about it like that, but that makes a lot of sense."

Now, these are ALL wonderful compliments, but this is how I see myself:
As a normal human being with feelings and needs just like everyone else.

Now back to the idea of repression. I believe that stating that repression is a defense mechanism that begins as a choice is glossing over the complicated nature of it. Because of the way people view me as a strong, resilient, intelligent, wise, compassionate, selfless person who has no problem with expressing herself, providing comfort to those in need, and the ability to shed new light upon a circumstance or situation that builds some sort of strength in others because of the depths I travel to find balance in things...what happens when I feel weak, helpless, stupid, shallow, selfish, having problems finding an explanation, am myself in need of comfort, and having problems finding the light of day in a circumstance or situation, and have no strength? I will tell you. It is left for me to deal with myself. Ah-ha...I should just climb right into my telephone booth and emerge the superhuman person that everyone perceives me to be, I guess. What you project, gets reflected back to you by others.

I have broken a cycle in the manner of how to treat others (as opposed to how I had become accustomed to being treated) because I remember full well how it felt to feel pushed aside, ignored, unimportant, and living a life without support, compassion, and understanding....so the assessment of the onlookers of me is pretty accurate...HOWEVER, the part that follows "treat others" (which I have mastered)....."as you would want to be treated" gets lost on me. No one seems to think that I need back what I give because I've made it my nature to GIVE and be strong. And I ask myself...why is this??? And the answer is...are you ready...hard pill to swallow right here....here goes....I teach people how to treat me. I may have added something to the lives of others by openly offering them those things that I never had...but I am still placing MYSELF in the position of being "tossed aside." It is nothing for me to lay myself down for the good of another, and do you know why? Because it was NEVER DONE FOR ME and I remember how that felt, so I cannot make anyone else feel the way I felt (OR AS THE CASE MAY BE...continue to FEEL). Now if I have no problem tossing MYSELF aside, then why should anyone else? This is the dynamic of projection/reflection. No one thinks that I need because I am always "okay" and more concerned that THEY are okay.

So this leads me to ask...is repression FORCED upon us by outer sources or our own conscience? If we are to love others above ourselves, turn the other cheek, treat others the way we would like to be treated etc., etc, etc....is this the true and pure way of life...to deny ourselves and to allow ourselves to be denied by others? Who knows for sure? When you appear to have it all under control all of the time and are perceived to be an endless vat of giving, who then thinks that YOU need anything? I would have to guess it is just one's way of pushing oneself aside before someone else does. The irony in this is you do it yourself to avoid it being done to you by others...and then....you get a double-whammy--by both yourself AND others. Do people not understand that the way I treat them is but a mere reflection of how I wish to be treated BY them? If I respect you, am honest with you, am compassionate toward you, am helpful to you in times of need. If I recognize in you a sadness, a fear, a confusion, and I reach out to you, does this not put some sort of passion in you to do the same for me when I display a need for such, or do you just ignore the fact that I have any needs at all in view of my superhuman strength and all? Not a hard concept really...is it?

So back to you old man winter...you and I have something in common right now. I feel ya! lol. You have held off what you are fully within your right to exercise for LONG enough, and I wanna be the first to tell ya...on one hand, I SO APPRECIATE THAT YOU DID, but at the same time, I realize your true nature, to be all of what you are, and so I understand the force in which you have burst back onto the scene. We all expect you to be strong and tireless in your effort to be all that you are, and yet, you have shown us a softer side. I want you to know, that I noticed the difference and appreciate that you, yourself, are multifaceted, have strengths and weaknesses. I am sure that there are a lot of people out there who would love for you to wear your more docile and giving "hat" to better accommodate them, make their lives easier and to fit more into their idea of what you should be as opposed to what you really are, but hey, I say, I have seen and appreciate you when you are strong and when you are weak. I noticed the beauty that you allowed to shine through in your repression...flowers blooming in my garden into the month of January...a savings on propane that before this year was unheard of OR ever expected at a time when I needed these things the most. So I see the good that comes from your more giving nature, but I also respect the force you exhibit when you display all that you are.

Yet another area of me that I need to focus into balance...still on the learning curve!! :)

“Most people have no idea of the giant capacity we can immediately command when we focus all of our resources on mastering a single area of our lives.”~ Anthony Robbins.

“To photograph is to hold one's breath, when all faculties converge to capture fleeting reality. It's at that precise moment that mastering an image becomes a great physical and intellectual joy.”~ Henri Cartier-Bresson.

“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.”~ Brian Tracy.

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power. If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.”~
Tao Te Ching.


Have a good day everyone...polish up on your YOU skills!! See ya back here soon!!

Raina--snowa, let the wind blowa.
I can see the seasons change,
My mind now set to rearrange,
the way you see me in your eyes.
The time has come to recognize,
that I'm no different than you are.
I'm not your wish upon a star.
Unless of course, you are mine too.
Just see me more... like I see you.

HA! I wasn't planning on that, but it just flowed...so I'm keepin' it!!

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

What is destiny made of..and how do I get there?

Hi everyone.

Been a while since I posted...been takin' in some research and working on balance in my life.

Some things I have delved into lately:

1. Interdependence vs. dependence and what role independence plays.

2. Mindset (this is a biggie).

3. Videos of the Dalai Lama on "Educating the Heart..which was based upon the premise of universal responsibility and love; an old Carl Jung interview; Howard Gardner speaking of his Theory of Multiple Intelligences.

4. How our brain has the innate capability of rewiring itself through mindset.

5. A book entitled "The Heart of the Soul~Emotional Awareness."

6. And...I've been doing a lot of thinking about destiny...where it comes from. Do we create our own or is it created for us. Does it spring from a seemingly innate talent or gift...or nothing more than self-interest.

This is what I have taken from these things respectively:

a. Interdependence is a key function of any healthy relationship. It's definition is "mutual dependence." What this means is the relationship first has to be reciprocal in nature. They have to be independent and able to hold their own on their own. They have to agree upon and adhere to the goal (correlative notion) of the relationship in word and deed. If one of the parties claims to be holding up their end of the correlative notion, but it turns out that they are not...there is no "interdependence" and it then turns to dependence. And as the saying goes: "One bad apple spoils the bunch", dependency breeds dependency. Whatever you project gets reflected. So interdependence--GOOD. Dependence--BAD. Core function of a healthy interdependent relationship is independence, where dependence is void of independence. So that was very interesting.

b. On mindset...This seems (from my research and personal experience) to be of utmost importance in any meaningful experience you have in your life. It seems to be a "silent witness" of sorts to everyone's actions, their successes, failures--basically, the result. There are 4 concretes that I have found that deal with the makings of a mindset..they are as follows: 1. Intent. 2. Motivation. 3. Action. 4. Consequence. Number 1 and number 4 are very closely related as #1 is the PLAN in mind to achieve #4, the end result..the two in between are only the avenues of travel between the two. So basically, the first and the last (hmmmm) are one in the same.

c. Dalai Lama: Intelligence (development of the brain) does not within itself bring joyfulness or happiness. Material (outside matter) does not bring about inner peace. It is compassion and the security it develops alone that defeats fear and discontent. He also says that violence is the opposite of peace and goes on to state that your intent and motivation are what make you violent or nonviolent...it is not always within the outward action--but in the end result of the action. The example he uses was this: If your intent and motivation is of sincere compassion for others' well-being, then your disposition is nonviolent, and most likely, your actions will reflect that and the end result will be one of mutual peace. However, he said, if your intent and motivation is to harm another, exploit another, or cheat another, then the outward action may be kind words, praise, and gift-giving, though the intent/motivation makes any of these "nice" actions violent, as the OUTCOME (consequences) of those actions will eventually prove. We must not read one's mindset by the words or action, but ALWAYS by the end result.

Carl Jung: The interviewer asks of him: "Do you believe in God?" His answer: "I don't know how to answer that, other than to say, I KNOW, therefore, there is no need to believe." Enough said about that.

Howard Gardner: Intelligences: 1. Linguistic. 2. Logical/math. 3. Spatial. 4. Body kinesthetic. 5. Inter-/intrapersonal. 6. Musical. 7. Naturalistic. 8. Existential/spiritual intelligence (which he deems as only a 1/2 of an intelligence). His stance on "learning styles" is this: "Learning styles are mute and irrelevant...you either HAVE that specific intelligence, or you don't." I argue that what he considers to be only 1/2 of an intelligence contains all of the former intelligences in order to make it whole...and yet, he considers it to be non-adherent to any of the others. All I can say about that is...he is a scientist and we all know how scientists and masters of all of these "seemingly" separate disciplines hate to intermingle them with any concept larger than their minute understanding or consideration. I can place an existential stamp upon every one of these intelligences, but I cannot place a common stamp onto any from any of the others alone.

d. The book..well, it makes some good points, however, it is a bit too radical for me. It is sort of an either/or proposition and there are no gray areas. It is sort of like saying...if you are human then you are not of God, but if you are of God, you are not human. We are BOTH and our goal here is not to become one or the other to any extreme, but to achieve a healthy balance of both. If there is one thing I have learned in this life, it is that there is a lot of gray out there intermingled within the poles. It isn't about good and bad. It isn't about right and wrong. It is about our pure and natural state covered in this body trying to live a balance of who we are and what others expect of us. Nothing more, nothing less. The Dalai Lama put it this way. When we are born of our mothers, we come purely in need...at the very basic level of LOVE, COMPASSION, and SELFLESSNESS of others. The mother gives this to the child as if he/she were an extension of her own body. This builds trust and through this trust, security. THIS is how we are to live our lives--in an interdependent relationship with all we encounter, and where we cannot do this...an independent, whole within ourselves life. We have to FIRST give ourselves love, compassion, and selflessness, build trust and security within ourselves. The only choice we make is to do the opposite of our natural state. We never choose to do good, be compassionate, be sensitive, loving, selfless...it is our natural state...when we do this, we are being true to our purest nature...we REMAIN. We only choose to NOT remain and do what is contrary. PERIOD. As the good book says in 1 Corinthians 13:13..."And these three REMAIN, faith, hope, and love and the greatest of these is love." We come into this world blameless and pure..it is within the consequence of our actions that shows whether or not we remain or we sell out.

Finally, on DESTINY. Yesterday, a very respected friend of mine (and once college professor) posted on Facebook a quote as follows: "Destiny has two ways of crushing us - by refusing our wishes and by fulfilling them." - Henri Frederic Amiel

My reply: ...and that just goes to show...destiny has NOTHING to do with what we "want" but more our willingness to recognize how our disposition, propensities, and mindset gather together in one place no matter where we find ourselves... :)

So I guess that answers my question about whether or not we create our destiny or whether it is just finally, at some point, recognized, accepted, and followed.

This may or may not be AT ALL useful to you...but I feel like I had to make an appearance and letcha all know (those who frequent my site) what's been brewin' lately. Working on my book sort of demands research!

In closing today, I would like to share something that I feel is important and pertinent to all of the above..Your higher self is the part of you striving toward your destiny. Your destiny must never be used as an "escape" or detour from any painful or discomforting reality, but it must be an integration of centering oneself in the path to be traveled to achieve it. Otherwise, you will ever remain detoured. Your life will become a series of stops and starts, never reaching your destination. I have witnessed so many people in their "zone", whether it be the gift of music, art, writing or what-have-you...view this "destiny" as a seperate place from themselves to go...as an escape route...maybe their own personal "Heaven" where they are the only occupant. Don't do this. Your destiny will always be attached to some sort of service to OTHERS...it is not there for your utilization alone...and it is not just to be "shared" with others during your time of escape, but it should EXTEND from you to them in the spirit in which it is given TO you..there should be a cohesive nature of your destiny to touch others in a more meaningful way than a temporary "fix." If you use it in that way...it will be used by others in that way...just sayin. There are also those who "ignore" their destiny and instead try to create one of their own...they are the ones who are beamed in on the technical aspects, always trying to improve themselves by "taking everyone else's word for it" and searching for "outside" instruction instead of just making their own mark and trusting and knowing that what comes NATURALLY from within is their own. You know you recognize your destiny and are following it when...you find that anything you attempt to learn about a certain idea you have has the footprint of your idea already on it...what you learn is more of a validation than a revelation and our need is not to KNOW everything about it, but to be content with the fact that you recognize it when you see it.

Any real truth you wish to learn will always be found in the experience--more to point, the nuance and irony. Nuance and irony will never be recognized in a thought or a desire...as they are contained only within the experience.

Short version: A destiny achieved is a legacy created. Think about that....really think about it.

Much love and focus to you all...
Raina

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Good New Year Morning to all!!


I awaken this morning to quiet in the homestead...bright sunshine...have already taken a nice scenic drive and listened to some set-your-ass-on-fire music...what a wonderful way to begin the day and a brand new year!! We have had very little snow and very few cold temps this winter so far. Yesterday and today...a turtleneck/hoodie...and I'm good to go...almost unheard of in these parts at this time of year...but I take it as nature's way of rebelling against what is known by history and thus perceived as truth now and making a mockery of it!! Anything can change. If I can look into my flower garden after it has snowed a couple of times and the temps have gotten down into the teens (with wind-chill) and see the color purple and green still peeking out amongst a backdrop of the brown and withered the first day of JANUARY, whereas last year this time, I was attempting to thaw out my toilet pipe with a hairdryer with snowfall being nonstop until April..I'm thinking it is a sign that THIS YEAR, things are changing..and I am READY for it.

Usually, New Year's day is just another day to me...and I just could really never wrap my head around a celebration of the "day after 365 or day #1 of 365." This year feels different to me. It is laced with a feeling of new beginnings, new challenges, new mindset, and gettin' down to business! I am full of positive, forward-thrusting energy that feels almost uncontainable as I look forward to setting into motion this new mindset that feels so "in tune" with who I am...which hasn't really happened in a very long time. The years 2008-2011, for me, were years of major conflict, hardship, confusion, and hard-truth, which led ultimately to the last part of 2011 being a season of re-evaluation, readministration, and reconstruction. I embrace this new year with an inward celebration unlike any other "ushering in." It feels right. It feels just. It feels balanced, and I know that this is a chance for me to take forward the new me that emerged once I opened my eyes this morning to greet this day. Things are already different, and my challenge to myself is to keep them on this path. No swaying, no dill-dallying, no FEAR.

I look to these lovely little wild pansies in my garden as an inspiration and today, January 1, 2012, the sun shines brightly and warmly upon them and they smile back...they have survived the cold, sunless, wet and mold against all odds. They tell me what it really means to be beautiful, different, strong, resilient...they tell me that living "within the season" means nothing...but creating for yourself, a season to LIVE means everything. It doesn't matter what surrounds you..whether it is alive or dead, with color or without, you can make for yourself a beautiful life that stands OUT among the rest DESPITE the circumstance and do it with grace.

My wish for all today and the year to come a season of prosperity, growth, good health, and a spirit of new beginnings. Take ahold of your dreams, your aspirations, your MIND--and with them, reach to the highest heights, push yourself to your limits, and bloom right there...where you are, no matter what the outside circumstance may be attempting to tell you about YOU. It can be done...my little purple, life-filled January babies are proof of that!!

Sending good tidings of GREAT JOY your way...grab 'em!!

Lots of love,
Raina