Hi everyone.
Been a while since I posted...been takin' in some research and working on balance in my life.
Some things I have delved into lately:
1. Interdependence vs. dependence and what role independence plays.
2. Mindset (this is a biggie).
3. Videos of the Dalai Lama on "Educating the Heart..which was based upon the premise of universal responsibility and love; an old Carl Jung interview; Howard Gardner speaking of his Theory of Multiple Intelligences.
4. How our brain has the innate capability of rewiring itself through mindset.
5. A book entitled "The Heart of the Soul~Emotional Awareness."
6. And...I've been doing a lot of thinking about destiny...where it comes from. Do we create our own or is it created for us. Does it spring from a seemingly innate talent or gift...or nothing more than self-interest.
This is what I have taken from these things respectively:
a. Interdependence is a key function of any healthy relationship. It's definition is "mutual dependence." What this means is the relationship first has to be reciprocal in nature. They have to be independent and able to hold their own on their own. They have to agree upon and adhere to the goal (correlative notion) of the relationship in word and deed. If one of the parties claims to be holding up their end of the correlative notion, but it turns out that they are not...there is no "interdependence" and it then turns to dependence. And as the saying goes: "One bad apple spoils the bunch", dependency breeds dependency. Whatever you project gets reflected. So interdependence--GOOD. Dependence--BAD. Core function of a healthy interdependent relationship is independence, where dependence is void of independence. So that was very interesting.
b. On mindset...This seems (from my research and personal experience) to be of utmost importance in any meaningful experience you have in your life. It seems to be a "silent witness" of sorts to everyone's actions, their successes, failures--basically, the result. There are 4 concretes that I have found that deal with the makings of a mindset..they are as follows: 1. Intent. 2. Motivation. 3. Action. 4. Consequence. Number 1 and number 4 are very closely related as #1 is the PLAN in mind to achieve #4, the end result..the two in between are only the avenues of travel between the two. So basically, the first and the last (hmmmm) are one in the same.
c. Dalai Lama: Intelligence (development of the brain) does not within itself bring joyfulness or happiness. Material (outside matter) does not bring about inner peace. It is compassion and the security it develops alone that defeats fear and discontent. He also says that violence is the opposite of peace and goes on to state that your intent and motivation are what make you violent or nonviolent...it is not always within the outward action--but in the end result of the action. The example he uses was this: If your intent and motivation is of sincere compassion for others' well-being, then your disposition is nonviolent, and most likely, your actions will reflect that and the end result will be one of mutual peace. However, he said, if your intent and motivation is to harm another, exploit another, or cheat another, then the outward action may be kind words, praise, and gift-giving, though the intent/motivation makes any of these "nice" actions violent, as the OUTCOME (consequences) of those actions will eventually prove. We must not read one's mindset by the words or action, but ALWAYS by the end result.
Carl Jung: The interviewer asks of him: "Do you believe in God?" His answer: "I don't know how to answer that, other than to say, I KNOW, therefore, there is no need to believe." Enough said about that.
Howard Gardner: Intelligences: 1. Linguistic. 2. Logical/math. 3. Spatial. 4. Body kinesthetic. 5. Inter-/intrapersonal. 6. Musical. 7. Naturalistic. 8. Existential/spiritual intelligence (which he deems as only a 1/2 of an intelligence). His stance on "learning styles" is this: "Learning styles are mute and irrelevant...you either HAVE that specific intelligence, or you don't." I argue that what he considers to be only 1/2 of an intelligence contains all of the former intelligences in order to make it whole...and yet, he considers it to be non-adherent to any of the others. All I can say about that is...he is a scientist and we all know how scientists and masters of all of these "seemingly" separate disciplines hate to intermingle them with any concept larger than their minute understanding or consideration. I can place an existential stamp upon every one of these intelligences, but I cannot place a common stamp onto any from any of the others alone.
d. The book..well, it makes some good points, however, it is a bit too radical for me. It is sort of an either/or proposition and there are no gray areas. It is sort of like saying...if you are human then you are not of God, but if you are of God, you are not human. We are BOTH and our goal here is not to become one or the other to any extreme, but to achieve a healthy balance of both. If there is one thing I have learned in this life, it is that there is a lot of gray out there intermingled within the poles. It isn't about good and bad. It isn't about right and wrong. It is about our pure and natural state covered in this body trying to live a balance of who we are and what others expect of us. Nothing more, nothing less. The Dalai Lama put it this way. When we are born of our mothers, we come purely in need...at the very basic level of LOVE, COMPASSION, and SELFLESSNESS of others. The mother gives this to the child as if he/she were an extension of her own body. This builds trust and through this trust, security. THIS is how we are to live our lives--in an interdependent relationship with all we encounter, and where we cannot do this...an independent, whole within ourselves life. We have to FIRST give ourselves love, compassion, and selflessness, build trust and security within ourselves. The only choice we make is to do the opposite of our natural state. We never choose to do good, be compassionate, be sensitive, loving, selfless...it is our natural state...when we do this, we are being true to our purest nature...we REMAIN. We only choose to NOT remain and do what is contrary. PERIOD. As the good book says in 1 Corinthians 13:13..."And these three REMAIN, faith, hope, and love and the greatest of these is love." We come into this world blameless and pure..it is within the consequence of our actions that shows whether or not we remain or we sell out.
Finally, on DESTINY. Yesterday, a very respected friend of mine (and once college professor) posted on Facebook a quote as follows: "Destiny has two ways of crushing us - by refusing our wishes and by fulfilling them." - Henri Frederic Amiel
My reply: ...and that just goes to show...destiny has NOTHING to do with what we "want" but more our willingness to recognize how our disposition, propensities, and mindset gather together in one place no matter where we find ourselves... :)
So I guess that answers my question about whether or not we create our destiny or whether it is just finally, at some point, recognized, accepted, and followed.
This may or may not be AT ALL useful to you...but I feel like I had to make an appearance and letcha all know (those who frequent my site) what's been brewin' lately. Working on my book sort of demands research!
In closing today, I would like to share something that I feel is important and pertinent to all of the above..Your higher self is the part of you striving toward your destiny. Your destiny must never be used as an "escape" or detour from any painful or discomforting reality, but it must be an integration of centering oneself in the path to be traveled to achieve it. Otherwise, you will ever remain detoured. Your life will become a series of stops and starts, never reaching your destination. I have witnessed so many people in their "zone", whether it be the gift of music, art, writing or what-have-you...view this "destiny" as a seperate place from themselves to go...as an escape route...maybe their own personal "Heaven" where they are the only occupant. Don't do this. Your destiny will always be attached to some sort of service to OTHERS...it is not there for your utilization alone...and it is not just to be "shared" with others during your time of escape, but it should EXTEND from you to them in the spirit in which it is given TO you..there should be a cohesive nature of your destiny to touch others in a more meaningful way than a temporary "fix." If you use it in that way...it will be used by others in that way...just sayin. There are also those who "ignore" their destiny and instead try to create one of their own...they are the ones who are beamed in on the technical aspects, always trying to improve themselves by "taking everyone else's word for it" and searching for "outside" instruction instead of just making their own mark and trusting and knowing that what comes NATURALLY from within is their own. You know you recognize your destiny and are following it when...you find that anything you attempt to learn about a certain idea you have has the footprint of your idea already on it...what you learn is more of a validation than a revelation and our need is not to KNOW everything about it, but to be content with the fact that you recognize it when you see it.
Any real truth you wish to learn will always be found in the experience--more to point, the nuance and irony. Nuance and irony will never be recognized in a thought or a desire...as they are contained only within the experience.
Short version: A destiny achieved is a legacy created. Think about that....really think about it.
Much love and focus to you all...
Raina
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