Hi to all who stop by today!
I'm kind of at a loss as to what to talk about this morning...IMAGINE THAT! Mark it on your calendars and remember this day becuz these are very few and far-between in the world of a curious and active mind! I did have chance to revisit the college yesterday to drop off a paper that my daughter forgot to hand in that was due yesterday to one of my favorite professors when I attended. He expressed "missing me" and when I came back, urged me to PLEASE take one of his courses. Made me nostalgic. I want so bad to return...and next spring..THAT, I will do. I left things unfinished there, and I am not one to do this. I completed one year of my 2-year degree (which was to eventually work into a Masters this time). I returned for my 3rd semester and completed half of that and had to withdraw to save my GPA as there were things of a personal nature distracting me enough to sink my grades at midterm to D's. Yeah...me, little miss Type-A...I could NOT live with that, nor did I believe that I could, at that time, turn that trend around...so in that sobered realization, I apprehensively withdrew...and it cost me 1/2 a semester of time, all the work, and $800...but to me it was a small price to pay to keep my 3.8 GPA intact...because I was focused on the PRIZE, the ends. I don't ever want to do ANYTHING just to get through it...if I am gonna do anything, it has to be done to the best of my ability, or it is just not worth doing at all. I am NOT just a "go with the motion" type of girl, that is for damn sure. To me, I paid a very small price...a moment in time and some money...big deal...to PRESERVE something of way more importance...the very hard, concentrated work that was representative of me, my abilities, and time well-spent the first year. To continue on when I knew that neither my heart nor my mind was in it would have in the end, robbed me of what I had worked so hard for. I also knew that all of my effort would HAVE to be placed where I WAS...and that was not in a classroom nor was it in writing papers, working problems, and the like. I understood my limitations and chose to pay the smaller of the two prices. It is an engrained attitude of mine to show the best of myself in everything I do, and if I am in a position where the best of me is not shining through....then it just has to be tanked...for a time. I will leave NOTHING unfinished. I do not quit BUT I am very attuned to my limitations. I weigh my options, consider outcomes, and then make the best decision in that light. No harm, no foul. Once I scrape up that money, the slate is clean and I will begin again and I will produce a work that I feel worthy of placing my name upon. I leave myself with opportunity, always. The flip side of that would have been to continue on (and things got even worse in the circumstances that led to my withdrawing), I would have failed out, totally ruined any opportunity to transfer if that was indeed what I chose to do to continue, and would have always lived with the regret that I had NOT taken that time out...and I would have had to pay my entire tuition back...because grants are based upon a GPA standard. And then, the entire 2 years would have been a waste, and I would have felt like a compete failure.
WOW. Even in the loss of something to say....my automatic pilot just kicks in I guess...
So the message for today kids is, I guess...be true to yourselves, weigh your options, make your choices carefully, consider consequences in light of every cirumstance...because the outcome of those choices will ALWAYS reflect who you really are. We will always have these little unforeseen circumstances that just seem to pop up from nowhere that we are unprepared to deal with...there may be enough temptation in them to make you consider turning away from yourself, but my experience dictates that if you look at what this decision will do to your overall state of well-being and how it will reflect back upon you, you will make the right decision every time. And there will be a "smaller" price to pay...but after that debt is taken care of or moved beyond, you walk away intact, your integrity and character preserved, and opportunity will be awaiting you with open arms and contained within it another CHANCE..that you gave to yourself...with no burden put upon another to afford it to you.
Just as you wouldn't put your name upon anything you feel unworthy of donning it...you EMBODY your name... and how much MORE important is the LIFE YOU LEAD to your name?
"A perfection of means and a confusion of aims seems to be our main problem."~Albert Einstein.
"Means we use be as pure as the ends we seek."~Martin Luther King Jr.
XOXOXOOXOXOOXOX
Will sign this today...Encouraged.
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